Paris Hilton is a lame singer, not a porn star. But when she’s on TV, everyone just can’t stop thinking she really is a porn star. And let’s not forget Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan. So what really happened to pop culture?
With problems related to global warming and Obama controversies, I am still bothered by Paris Hilton. Now, I am finding ways on how to change the world without her.
1. Kill Paris or instead of letting her waste her time kissing dogs, make her take a master’s degree in mba online. That would serve her best. Next time your boyfriends tell you Paris and all the other women have nothing else to offer except stupid brains, tell them to go to hell and then kill them one by one.
2. Change the world by killing all emo band members. Hitler hates emo. Pathetic emo bands don’t belong here in this world, they should go to mars and be pathetic forever.
3. Kill all the cockroaches by stepping on their bodies, not by spraying commercial toxic pesticide. Save a few lungs and perform the cockroach massacre the natural way. Think of the crunchy sound each time you step on their fat bodies.
4. While there are possible threats about countries going after other countries for oil, be a good fellow by supporting vampires who only fly when they travel to other places, thus zero oil consumption. Support the witches and say yes to broomsticks.
5. Kill Kanye West and save all the teens and Taylor Swift lookalikes from being dissed.
6. Change the world and kill all those who tortured monks in Burma.
7. Kill the racists who claim Asians should be cooking for them, not sharing dinners with them. The world is not just about the United States.
8. Change the world and kill the men who claim that pop culture is anti-women. These men claimed women are gold diggers (as portrayed in TV shows like Joe Millionaire) and that women love to be stared at by different men when they are naked, posing for porn movies and magazines.
9. Kill the writers who keep telling the women to be skinny is to be beautiful. A woman is beautiful whether she is skinny or fat. A woman is beautiful whether she has boobs or without boobs at all.
10. Kill everyone who hates the Powerpuff girls. Kindergarten girls like the PPG can be superheroes in your town.